Sunday, March 09, 2008

Scenes from a Queens ER

A sweet little Indian girl dressed in her beautiful traditional Hindu clothing and white doctor's jacket, approached me with a smile and a needle.

She made some explanation about giving me a Heplock for an IV because my bloodwork showed I was dehydrated. She stuck me the first time. Having had experience with IV's I was pretty sure she didn't quite have it right. I questioned the placement of that knife-like needle rolling around and being jammed further and further under my skin. I questioned the continued massage and jab motions that continued for several minutes. I tried to bight my tongue and find a happy place. Oh, there's my happy place! It's nestled in the throbbing pain of my concussion. Ah, sweet relief.

She blamed her failed attempt on the collapsed veins of my dehydrated self, and tried a second time. Her second attempt was not quite as excruciating, but I was lost in the birds and roses of my concussion-land. She brought me back to reality by explaining she promised to try only once more. During her third attempt, a second expert came by and started jabbing with her. I think I chose this third time to utter: "Seriously?" and then went back to my concussion-happy place.

She apologized and in her very sweet and proper way told me how brave I was, and left me with three bleeding holes in my hand, but no heplock.

The second dude came over with far less serious clothing on and stabbed me gently and got the heplock going lickity split. I was grateful to his expertise.

After I had my fluids going at a steady clip, I got a new roommate in the ER. Gladys had a black eye far worse than mine. She had been drinking like a sailor, and as a result was talking like one too. There was a tiny little kid sitting right near her bed watching everything she did. It was disconcerting, especially when she managed to take her pants and underpants off and was walking around naked from the waste down. Gladys! Put your clothes on! The ER staff had had about enough of her shenanigans after about an hour and a few white-jackets came right over and put her to sleep, with a needle. I was glad they got that one stuck right in the right spot. Oh Gladys.


D said...


That heplock story made me pretty woozy. I think I better just sit here for a minute before trying to get up.

Chloe said...

Yeah, that's what you want going on in your room after you have a concussion...uggghhhh :)

TftCarrie said...

Why is it that the craziness follows you wherever you go?!

Aprilyn said...

I HATE needles!! They can never stick me the first time! I hope you get better soon. Are you home now? I need to ask you and your Mom and Dad to help me with a memory book about my Mom. Please email me for info: