Friday, January 15, 2010


Here it is:

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Third Person Thursday

At the end of September, she had to make a fish face for a casting.

She hates wasting her time by going to castings in which she is not qualified to participate. She carefully checks over the specifics: age? weight? role? product? (Once she waited at an audition for almost 2 hours only to find that she had to eat something that she was allergic to-infuriating!). She won't attend tobacco, alcohol or gambling auditions, and is also restricted by some of her allergies (cats are out).

She read the casting email and went straight to the bathroom to practice her fishface in the mirror. She thought it was doable, pretty good. She actually practiced a bunch because it didn't come easily to her mouth. She thought she qualified though, and committed to going.

When she got to the casting there were a billion people there from age 4 to 82. She sat down to wait for her number and started practicing her fishface. Another woman waiting to go in as well, laughed at her. She didn't find that funny, she said: "I have to practice. The fishface doesn't come naturally to me," and then she went on practicing.

It was time. She went in. She knew the photographer from the 3 generation photoshoot she did a few years back. He was super patient with her as she tried to get the perfect fish face. She struck her pose, which also involved wonky eyes for her, for some reason (she couldn't achieve it smiling), and he would give direction: "Open your lips more. Now squeeze, ok and open!"

She had a difficult time. She suggested having a mirror near the lens so that the model could see what the photographer was talking about! It's very hard to make an adjustment without looking. She started thinking outloud and realized that nobody cared and there were tons of people waiting, so she threw up her hands and started walking out.

He grabbed her by the waist and encouraged her to try a few more. OKAY! She tried just a few more and then gave up. She walked to the bathroom reflecting on what a waste of time that was, and that it was for the best because she grinds her teeth all night, every night and just those few fishfaces were a little stressing to her muscles, and she didn't think she could tolerate an ENTIRE photoshoot of that face.

Cut to the first week of November.

"Hi, this is the producer of the fishface casting you went on. We want to use an image from the casting for our campaign."

Are you kidding me?
I was terrible.

"You didn't have the BEST fishface of the 500 fishfaces we shot, but it was the cutest."

Are you kidding me?

And so. There it is. She practiced, she did her best, she got the job, and she didn't have to go through the potentially tedious photoshoot that a fishface photo would require.

Negotiations between client and agent went on for about a week and then seemed to fizzle out, so by the time the holidays and the broken foot came around, she thought; "oh well, I guess that's that, they went a different direction." She was disappointed.

Suddenly, anonymous blogger spy extraordinaire commented last week:

"is that you in the tuna fish coupon insert in this month good housekeeping?"

What? At first she was angry, because she was pretty certain it was her, and to her knowledge, a deal had never gone through...but after some help from super-anonymous-spy-blogger and her cousin through facebook, she saw that YES! It was her, and her agent was able to confirm the contract, which apparently got lost in the HOLIDAZE.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

23 Months.

23 Months.

That's how long it's been since I have shot a commercial. That's my longest stretch since I started working in the commercial industry about 4 years ago.

At the end of February 2008 I shot two commercials in one week. One was for Visine and the other for Huggies. The next week I hit my head and started another journey completely.

I recovered for a few months, and then I started auditioning again. After I didn't book for a while, I cut my hair because I thought the long hair wasn't working. Then the recession hit. Auditions became pretty sparse. I made as many as I could and in 2009 I saw a high callback rate. I got put on hold a lot. I didn't book one commercial in 2009.

Before I broke my foot I thought; "This is my last chance, these are the last few weeks of the year, I could still do this! I could book something!" The broken foot was a bigger blow because I hadn't met my personal quota for the year, and the opportunities were cut short.

I am happy to report, the streak is over. Last week's audition made way for yesterday's callback and Friday's shoot! I booked it!

I was in the room for quite a while, and the director even rose out of her chair-always a good sign! I felt really great when I left, so hours later when the phone rang and it was my agent on the line---I didn't even let him get the words out, I just screamed! I knew it! I knew it! AAAAAAH! The product is new I think, so it will be fun to see what the commercial is like!

The tankini I wore for the audition I have worn for two other jobs, so it is now my lucky tankini.

To book a commercial in January is so great because I have all year to earn enough to qualify for the BEST INSURANCE ON THE PLANET. And we all know, if anyone needs the best insurance on the planet, it's ME.


I'm busy finishing 2009 chores (photo organization, video-editing, cleaning out the hard-drive), staring at my dirty house wondering why it doesn't clean itself, trying to make my food supply STRETCH until Friday, fantasizing about new electronics like a camera, wii fit, karaoke system, waiting for my yarn and crochet hook to arrive, stressing about the 4 events I have on Saturday and yet that dirty house situation, and my pasty tankini callback I have later today.

So, I'm not blogging.

BUT. I gotta get that Kate girl off the top of the blog. So, here is a pic of Phoebe from last week when she was her bravest yet as I yanked out tooth #5.

Monday, January 11, 2010

Hair Attack.

I saw this cover at Barnes and Noble and gasped!

Nevermind the expense of time and money of these extensions, this woman and her hair!

I have not followed the story very closely, nor do I want to talk badly about this woman, so I will just talk about her hair.

I have experienced the same as she: very short hair to super-long, and believe me--nothing about it is a picnic. In order for it to look good, it takes hours to blow it out and style it.

And the whole time, you smell like someone else's hair. And that is disgusting.

Couldn't they have at least matched the extensions to her dye? I am so confused.

Sunday, January 10, 2010


I am so sad that I will have to miss today's Improv Everywhere No Pants Subway Ride.

At 3 pm today I will be teaching seminary to 4 or 5 teenagers in the warmth and cozy comfort of my condo, but I will wistfully wish I was on the N train beholding the de-pantsing of many a brave New Yorker.

If I could, I would:

Aren't my bloomers cute? I love a good, stylish underpinning.

Saturday, January 09, 2010

Friday, January 08, 2010

Back in the Pasty Saddle

Today I sat in a casting office in a tankini, with about 20 other girls, coming and going, dressed similarly.

Only, we all had on various other pieces of clothing to keep us warm. One girl wrapped her scarf around her butt, twice. Another wore a pashmina like a bath towel. I sat on my coat, draped my shirt over my legs and wore my big chunky sweater, until it was time to walk in.

I took two steps into the room and the casting director said:

What happened to you?
-What do you mean?
(She looked at my leg)
-Oh, I broke my foot, but I'm fine, it was 8 weeks ago
Oh good, because, right after I asked that, I was like: what if she has a disability?

So we talked about the foot, and I hoped she didn't note that I wasn't a smooth walker. I thought I could fool people by walking slowly and carefully. Nope, still limping. Though, I don't think the photographer noticed at Wednesday's go-see.

And then I had to do a full-body slate. Feels good after sitting on my bum for the past 8 weeks and eating a lot of mint brownies and cupcakes and toblerone and peppermint junior mints and craisinets (I call them craisinets, but really it's CRANBERRY raisinets) and...

And after that humiliation, I went into the frigid air, home to my children, but not before stopping at the local grocery store for a marshmallow-frosted devils food Entemann's cake.

Thursday, January 07, 2010

Kage Jackson

Santa brought me Season 1 of Charlie's Angels for Christmas. I watched about 3 episodes of it and it is total eye candy. I love the clothes, hair, even the makeup thrills me!

The week after Christmas I visited my fave store with a giftcard from my grandma and acquired this beauty (for about 40% off), which makes me feel like an angel as soon as I put it on.

And now I want to crochet an afghan like my great grandma made for her grandchildren. So...I need to figure out how to crochet to start...

Wednesday, January 06, 2010


My husband finally joined an online social network. Wait, it's not SOCIAL, it's all about WORK.

He needed a new pic, since the one he took was with his blackberry, of himself, after GUM surgery which turned his cheek green and swollen. Pretty.

So, I took a new picture for him, and I like it very much.

It's his Saturday casual look, but he still looks trustworthy, and handsome. He's mine.

Tuesday, January 05, 2010

Mommy College: Parenting from the Inside Out by Daniel Siegel

It has taken me a while to read this book because I could not get it from the library, and so had to read 15 minutes here and there at Lolly's school.

This is a book about how to the best parent you can be. It does not give you information on how to change your children, but how to change yourself. Even people without children could use this book so that they could better handle any relationships: spousal, workplace, friendships, etc.

I could have REALLY used this book back in the ragey times, when I was starting new meds that were making me extra crazy. One of my favorite concepts covered in the book is choosing between taking the low road and the high road when in a situation with your children.

I found myself on the low road a lot back in the dark days, only I called it: The moving sidewalk at the airport.

It's like I stepped on and I could not get off until it had run it's course. That would mean yelling, and then yelling some more and repeating myself and ranting and raving until it was done. And I was not a fan of this behavior in myself. And maybe what the kids did was a trigger for it, but they are certainly not to blame, only me.

In brief, if you find yourself having some temper issues, depression, anxiety or you can clearly connect your own bad parenting with experiences from your childhood and would like help exploring that, this book is for you!

Monday, January 04, 2010


After scanning my favorite blogs this afternoon, I am realizing that, in general, bloggers, or at least the bloggers I read, are fond of The New Year. In fact, they are a bit giddy about it!

I am also fond of a new start, but I am not giddy, at least not today. I enjoy the prospects, setting goals, having much to do and sort of running right out of the gate to try to be the first to GET. IT. DONE.

But on this Monday, the first Monday of 2010, I am tired of people debating whether or not to say two-thousand ten or twenty-ten (I prefer the latter). I am tired. I cannot run, I can barely walk. I feel I don't have enough time to get it all done. This is a good thing right?, because in the past I would most likely believe I could do it all and in 5 minutes. So, there is growth there, but I am frustrated.

Often on the Monday before certain womanly things happen to me I am grumpy, so perhaps that's all this is, some imbalance of hormones. Maybe.

I went to the foot doctor today. The visit made me happy for many reasons. The entire staff was delightful, helpful. In 42 minutes I had x-rays done, was seen by the doctor, filled out three pages of paperwork and made an appointment to come back in 6 weeks. That is short. I was also happy to see my x-rays. I have had 5 full-sets of x-rays taken of my foot, and aside from the crude initial pix taken the morning of the accident, I have not seen a single excellent picture of my foot, until today.

The doctor showed me pix from 7 weeks ago compared to today. And, there was a difference! Healed completely? No. BUT! He said he was surprised at how progressed the healing was. He was also NOT concerned about my bone density or bone health. Yes! I left with these instructions: wean completely off the boot in the next 2 weeks, ease back in to activity, allowed: elliptical, bike, treadmill (walking only).

I'm not walking quite right yet. He asked if I wanted to go to therapy, but I don't really have time, and he agreed that I would figure it out eventually. I think I am scared. Yes, I am feeling fear about the foot. Tomorrow, in theory, I could wake up and work out. But, I'm scared. Maybe one more week!? And then at least my husband can be there with me when I try for the first time?

And I'm scared about some more stuff: Not being able to walk fast, or jog, or bound up and down subway steps, or make that train at the last second. I'm scared of people bumping my foot, of re-breaking it, of breaking the other one. I am scared that I will never be the same again! Fear. It's not good. And so, that is why, today I am not giddy or thrilled! I am more like a scared little dachshund I know...but I don't smell as bad (well, my foot does smell bad.)

Sunday, January 03, 2010


I did a google-search on myself just make sure everything is spic n span out there on the WWW.

AND, I found my photography documented in this article. No, I don't think I took that first photo, but I did take the others down below, of the famous folk. I took them on my fujifilm finepix point n shoot, back in 2004.

And all this I find hilarious.

And this surprise article written after my concert in early December. Thanks Mrs. Penick.

Saturday, January 02, 2010

New Year, New Digs.

During the past month I have been distracting myself by being the forman for the re-doing of our Great Room (as I prefer to call it). Going back in the archives of the blog (because most of my pics are stored away on hard drives that are not the easiest to access), I found several incarnations of our Great Room, to give you a sense of the BEFORE:

To see the progression since moving in, here are a few posts in chronological order, earliest to most recent:





What you can't see in the before picture is the other wall in which there is a media hutch with a tv on top of it, on a stand. We wanted to switch the tv to the other wall quite a while ago, but in order to make it clean, wireless and mounted... required a crew. We finally acquired the crew to cut holes in the walls at various spots to feed the necessary wires through to get it to the other side.

This took all day a few Saturdays ago. I took the kids to the Princess and the Frog and forgot about it. We replaced the hutch which jutted out from the 12-inch nook, about 10 inches. This bookshelf console is only 15 inches and looks cleaner and more airy. I love it.

The corner bookshelf came in wooden laminate. I decoupaged it with old black and white photos and paper, including the 60th-anniversary article of Jason's grandparents, my SAG letter welcoming me to the union, old contact sheets from a variety of photoshoots etc. The book clusters are color-coded in green, blue, white and black. You will notice an orange book cluster on the unit under the tv as well. I have not tackled the contents of the bright blue bookshelf, it needs a makeover too.

The ASTORIA print is by a graphic designer friend of mine. I saw it for the first time, fell in love, and bought it off his wall, framed and all. It is where we first lived when we moved to NYC, so it means a lot to me.

Other new additions: the giant leather sectional and the rug. I wanted the bigger-sized rug, but it was not available, but I'm ok with it, I love it. Much less SHED-y than the last big giant cream fuzzy that's what we've been working on. And we are so very happy, still in love with our condo after going on 3 years now...
PS. I want to knit a TV cozy to cover the TV, but J is trying to draw the line somewhere...

In the bedroom our linens had become thread-bare after only a few short years, but we love them, so we replaced it with the exact same brand, just a different design. Lolly is happy she inherited the old one for warmth, FINALLY she's allowed to be near mommy's bedspread. I cannot recommend it for durability, but they are soft, plush and really POP in the room. And I feel like BLUE DOG on the wall feels at home now.

That's all for rehabilitation for now. We would like to get covers for our air-conditioning/heater units, and do another round of: WHAT can GO?...which we do every 6 months....but other than that, we feel pretty great about our place right now!

Friday, January 01, 2010


May everything stay intact. Our family always seems to be at least, And Shhh....I just walked across my bedroom without crutches or my boot. Don't tell doc.


Reading over last year's goals, I find myself in a similar place, but having grown over the past year.

I need to allow space for more healing at least in the first half of the year. My foot needs to heal completely so that I can depend on it when I am off driving in the spring (coinciding with going off brain meds), and so that I am ready for summer on-foot adventures.

I need to allow space and unknowns for when I am weaned off the AEDS in the spring.

I have this anxious feeling in my belly that is pushing me to do! achieve! accomplish! It's a familiar feeling that I have lived with my entire life. When I experienced
HB08 and FB09 I heard this a lot: Maybe you need to slow down, take a break....and I understand that sentiment, but why? I've always been searching for the lesson of these trials, and is that one of them? I need to slow down?

I have about 4 big possible projects on the horizon and I find myself trying to tie one down....etch it in stone so that I have to accomplish it. Something to do! achieve! accomplish! in 2010.

And if I share here, that will make it sort of etched. One important lesson I learned in 2009, is that I am not really in control here. I need to be patient and flexible. So, I am going to work on a few or all of these projects, and be open to whatever is thrown my way that will change the plan. And I am going to hope that whatever is thrown my way will only enhance the outcome.

The goal for 2010 then, is this:

I just want to be ok.

By Ingrid Michaelson

I just want to be ok, be ok, be ok
I just want to be ok today
I just want to be ok, be ok, be ok
I just want to be ok today

I just want to feel today, feel today, feel today
I just want to feel something today
I just want to feel today, feel today, feel today
I just want to feel something today

Open me up and you will see
I'm a gallery of broken hearts
I'm beyond repair, let me be
And give me back my broken parts

I just want to know today, know today, know today
I just want to know something today
I just want to know today, know today, know today
Know that maybe I will be ok


Just give me back my pieces
Just give them back to me please
Just give me back my pieces
And let me hold my broken parts

I just want to be ok, be ok, be ok
I just want to be ok today
I just want to be ok, be ok, be ok
I just want to be ok today

I just want to feel today, feel today, feel today
I just want to feel something today
I just want to know today, know today, know today
Know that maybe I will be ok
Know that maybe I will be ok
Know that maybe I will be ok